


The Search

by terrifier



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Azula (Avatar) Needs a Hug, Azula (Avatar)-centric, F/M, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Protective Zuko (Avatar), Schizophrenia, Sibling Bonding, The Search comic rewrite, Whump
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:47:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25939162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terrifier/pseuds/terrifier
Summary: [my own rewrite of The Search]During the search for their mother, Azula shows a more vulnerable side to herself. Shocked at this, Zuko and the gaang become desperate for answers on how she came to be so evil and vindictive, so they make it their second mission to get those answers.What is revealed, however, they never would have expected.
Relationships: Aang/Katara (Avatar), Azula & Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 58





	The Search

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing an avatar fic. I watched the show a long time ago, but I recently got back into the fandom during the lockdown and I read one of the comics yesterday, so I wanted to write this :p
> 
> As it’s my first time writing an avatar fic, any advice is welcomed with open arms and constructive criticism would be appreciated :)
> 
> Enjoy x

The constant drip, drip, drip of water hitting damp stone grated on Azula’s already frayed nerves as she stared at the feet of her father, sat in front of her yet in a separate cell. She could already feel the smirk on the man’s face as he watched her fidget in her straight jacket.

_Drip, drip, drip._

Azula breathed out heavily through her nose at the incessant noise. It did nothing to silence the already loud voices in her head.

More voices emanated from outside the cell she was currently situated in. She almost couldn’t tell whether they were real or not, but she was saved the trouble of checking when the metal door opened behind her with a tormented creak.

The voices quickly grew louder and clearer, and she recognised them immediately. Her big brother Zuzu and the friend of the Avatar. She couldn’t remember the woman’s name. Something beginning with ‘S’. Oh, right. Suki, the name popped into her head.

”-tea? Zuko, they’re your prisoners, not your guests!” Suki was addressing Zuko.

”They’re still my family,” Zuko replied. The retort almost made Azula’s heart swell with warmth, but she quickly pushed the feeling away and replaced it with familiar anger and betrayal.

Seconds later, Zuko came into her line of sight carrying a tray of tea. Azula stared at it blankly for a moment, wondering if this was some form of joke, before she growled viciously and grabbed the tray between her teeth and pulled it out of Zuko’s hands, tossing it aside.

Zuko gasped and fell backwards with the force she’d torn the tray out of hands, landing on his backside with a thud. Quickly, Suki positioned herself in a defensive stance, apparently ready to take her on should she need to.

A chuckle drew her attention before she could berate Zuko on his inconsideration, and she, belatedly, she remembered it wasn’t just herself, Zuko, and Suki in the room. She drew into herself, refusing to look up at the man she was sat opposite.

Though there were bars separating them, and the man’s lack of fire bending prevented him from escape his cage, his mere stare burned deep into her soul like the holes she would burn into Zuko’s clothes for fun when they were children. She couldn't stand it.

Suddenly, pain bloomed from her neck and lower back, and her legs turned to mud. She fell to the floor with a thud and a gasp, whacking her chin on the stone, which sent a tingling pain spreading through her mouth and jaw.

”She’s already restrained! You don’t need to Chi block her!” Zuko shouted.

Azula looked up and met eyes with the girl who had blocked her chi and sent her sprawling to the floor, unable to catch herself with her arms and legs restrained.

”Ah, my old friend Ty Lee,” Azula noted with annoyance.

To her annoyance, the voices that had haunted her now for what felt like decades (though, it may well have been) began to talk over each other, hissing words overlapping like tidal waves attacking cliff faces.

 _Traitor_ they screamed _._ _She got them! Ursa, she turned them against you! Traitors! They answer to her! Your mother!_

It all sounded so logical. It was why they’d turned against her. It had to be! Why else would they turn their backs on their life-long friend?!

”Tell me how she got you and Mai!” Azula demanded desperately. She needed answers! “How’d she make you lose your fear of me?!”

”You’re not making any sense, Azula,” Ty Lee told her with a shake of her head.

”Ty Lee, Suki, let me handle this,” Zuko ordered, holding his hand out.

Azula could see the hesitance on their faces, but she could also see how relieved they were at the opportunity to leave. She watched, lying on the floor, unable to move, as they made their hasty retreat.

Once they were gone, Zuko helped her up off of the floor and back onto her chair, much to her relief. The floor was cold and damp, making some of her hair stick to the side of her face.

Zuko moved around so he was stood in front of her, allowing Azula to see him. She caught sight of the crown on his head, reflecting royally in the light beaming in through the bars on the door, and jealousy burned in her chest like an inferno. The scar on the side of his face only made her feel marginally better.

”You and father are meeting for the first time in over a year and I know these aren’t the best circumstances,” Zuko began, “I thought the tea might lend a little dignity.”

Azula looked at the spilled tea spilled on the floor, still steaming slightly, and felt what she could only describe as guilt. Looking up, she looked over Zuko’s shoulder and into the darkness shrouding the cell across from her. She could just about see the smirk the man was wearing as he stared at her and Zuko.

A burning welled up in her eyes and her throat began to feel funny. She swallowed strongly and looked up at Zuko.

”Let father and I talk to one another,” she requested flatly, blinking away what she knew was tears, “in private.”

Zuko looked reluctant to let the two of them be alone together, but eventually, he gave a short nod.

”Fine,” he agreed, turning on his heel and leaving the room.

The door shut behind him with a clang of metal on metal, and she and Ozai were plunged into near-darkness. The shadows crossing his face only brought out the malice and madness in his eyes.

Azula could almost hear both their heart beats over the whispering voices with the silence that reigned in the room. She forced herself to stare the man in the eyes with the promise to herself that couldn’t do anything to her from behind the bars.

Finally, after ten minutes, she grew antsy with the silence between them. She needed to say something, if only to distract herself from the insults and threats being thrown at her.

“I have a question,” she began.

”Dont you always?” Ozai replied, almost knowingly.

Azula almost wondered if he was in on it, too. If he’d done what he did because he hated her, just like everyone else. If he was a traitor, too, but she stopped herself before that train of thought could run wild. It was impossible, she told herself.

”Ursa, my mother,” she continued, “what happened to her?”

”That’s what you want to ask me?” Ozai scoffed.

”Yes,” Azula replied confidently. The bars, she reminded herself silently, the bars were protecting her.

”Well, if you insist,” the man said, a smirk growing on his face, “in the palace, you’ll find a hidden chamber, locked away behind a door only firebenders can open. In the room is a box containing hundreds of letters, written by Ursa over the years.”

Ozai fell silent after that, letting the room once again become quiet. Azula watched him with furrowed brows, waiting for more information, but none came, much to her frustration.

”Is that it? Is that all you’re going to tell me?” Azula demanded. “After everything, you can at least afford to give me more information! Which letter? Which letter is it! You can’t expect me to go through them all! Tell me!”

Ozai only laughed.

* * *

The air outside was cold, nipping at Azula’s nose and making her bring her arms in closer to herself. Suki was pushing Azula in a borrowed wheelchair, much to her displeasure.

As the ragtag group of babysitters talked amongst themselves about Azula as if she weren’t there, Azula looked up at the sky. It was as black as soot, littered with white stars that looked like pearls, winking at her every couple of seconds.

The moon was high up in the sky, perfectly rounded and bright. The pale light shone down on the unusual group, providing their only source of light. Azula almost wanted to look away from it, it was so bright.

She was drawn away from the sight by Ty Lee’s shouting.

”Be careful! The chi blocking will wear off soon!” She called to Zuko.

Azula was thus made aware that Ty Lee and Suki were now leaving. She smirked at their idiocy and kept her head down. Ty Lee was right, the chi block had almost worn off now. She could just about reach her bending abilities. Her limbs had gained feeling again, and she could move her arms in the small amount of space she had.

As soon as Ty Lee and Suki were gone, Zuko resumed pushing her through the palace grounds. The surface was uneven, and it made the wheels wobble a bit as they moved over small pebbles and cracks in the stone path. 

“So, what did you and father talk about?” Zuko asked, clearly attempting to make small talk.

”Oh, the usual,” Azula lied, “he asked me about the weather, I told him how much I was enjoying the scrumptious food at the nuthouse.”

Zuko was quiet for a moment before speaking again. Up head, Azula spotted a window. Subtly, she began wiggling one arm loose enough to push it through the neck of her straight jacket.

”I’ve asked the palace staff to prepare your old room. I’d like you to stay there instead of the institution,” Zuko told her. Azula didn't even begin to get into how much she didn’t want to stay in her old room. The place was tainted. “You’ll be guarded every minute of the day, of course, but it'll be more comfortable for you.”

”Have you ever been chi blocked, Zuzu?” Azula changed the subject.

”No,” Zuko answered.

”Funny thing. All your joints go soft, like they're made of melted wax,” she informed him, “then, for just a few moments as your strength returns, you find yourself more flexible than you ever thought possible!”

Using her free arm, Azula caught Zuko off guard by shooting lightning at him. As expected, he brought his arms up to protect himself and Azula used that moment to jump from the wheelchair and tear herself out of the straightjacket.

Unfortunately, her legs were still chained, but it was of little consequence to her because she quickly flipped herself so she was upside down. Zuko shot fire at her and she used that to burn the chains keeping her legs bound. To her relief, they broke and she was free to escape.

She had to find the letters Ozai told her of.

With her momentarily enhanced flexibility, she jumped up to the window she’d been eyeing and smashed through it easily. The glass cut her face and arms, making tiny red incisions in her pale skin, but it was easy to disregard the stinging pain with the adrenaline coursing through her veins. 

As her feet landed on the palace floor, she came face to face with a guard. She shot a ball of blue fire at the man and continued on her journey through the corridor in search of the hidden room she’d been informed of. She knew exactly which room Ozai spoke of and its location.

It was just down the hallway. At the sight of the door, she grinned. Her heart was pounding wildly inside her chest and her hands were shaking with excitement as she reached the door and threw it open. It hit the wall behind it, but her eyes only remained on the entrance to the hidden room.

A picture, with the fire symbol on it. Azula shot a ball of fire at the symbol and obediently, it opened to reveal a set of stairs.

”So close,” she whispered, “you can’t hide from me, mother.”

Like a wild animal let loose, she bounded down the stairs two at a time and pushed aside the red curtains hiding the room from sight.

Inside the room lay all sorts of ornaments that, as a child, had always intrigued her. She’d never asked her father about them, knowing he’d get mad that she’d found yet another one of his hidden rooms.

This time, however, none of them caught her attention as she locked her eyes onto the box Ozai had mentioned. She ran to it like it was her only salvation and threw the lid open to reveal hundreds of letters.

She began rummaging through them like there was no tomorrow, desperate to devour every last word on the old pages.

”They’re here, just like he said!” She laughed to herself. “Finally, finally he told the truth!”

”What is this place?”

”One of Ozai’s many secret chambers,” she answered without turning around to see her brother, “you really should have come exploring with me when we were little, Zuzu. But your fear always held you back. You should have embraced that fear, like I did.”

Standing up, Azula held one of the more uninteresting letters up for him to see.

”Give me what you’re holding,” Zuko ordered. Confusion and desperation were evident in his eyes.

”What, these? They’re many years worth of letters that _she_ wrote,” she informed him, “and they’re they key to finding her! Come have a look, Zuzu!”

Before he could even take more than two steps toward her, Azula burned the letter, letting it go up in flames. While Zuko was distracted by the letter she’d just burned, Azula used his distraction to hide the letter she’d really been reading in the waistband of her pants.

“No!” Zuko cried.

”Ha! You should see the look on your face! Priceless!” Azula laughed. Tears sprang to her eyes. 

“What the hell is wrong with you, Azula!” Zuko retorted angrily.

”Why don’t you ask her that?! I’m sure she’d be happy to tell you!” Azula shouted.

_Ask her. Ask her. She’ll tell you. You have to find her. Find her!_

Azula growled with frustration and agitation, covering her ears to block out the incessant chatter assaulting her senses.

”Look, believe it or not, brother dear, I want to find her as much as you do,” she panted with physical and mental exhaustion, cautiously uncovering her ears, “so, I’ll tell you what was in those letters on one condition... you take me with you to find her.”

**Author's Note:**

> Like it? Hate it? Let me know :) x


End file.
